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In a world that often feels busy, disconnected, and lonely, authentic friendship can seem out of reach. But God created us for community—where encouragement, support, and love are found through meaningful relationships. For Willow congregants Warren and Lindsay Habib, intentional friendships have marked their lives and they continue to cultivate them every day.

For nearly five decades, Willow has been more than a church or Sunday service for the Habib family—it’s been home. Warren has called Willow home for 47 years, and Lindsay for 45. It’s where they met while serving, where they got married, raised their children, and formed the kinds of friendships that have shaped their faith and enriched their lives.

We sat down with Warren and Lindsay to hear more about their journey and how meaningful connection continues to carry them forward.

• Looking back, how have your friendships changed in different seasons of life—from early marriage to parenting, and now? 
  • W: As friendships shift and evolve, it’s vital not to stop pursuing meaningful connection. Reflecting on 45 years of friendship—and the four dear friends I’ve lost to cancer—I’ve learned that deep relationships don’t happen by accident. For me, it started with joining a small group. That one step opened the door to lifelong friendships. Small groups are more than gatherings—they’re a pathway to genuine community. Maybe God is calling you not just to join one, but to lead. Don’t wait on the sidelines, you might be the answer to someone else’s prayer. Our hearts are especially with those in their 20s, and we pray this generation finds Christ-centered community and the belonging only He can provide.
  • L: I struggled with friendships into my 20s, until I took a step toward community by joining a small group at Primetime, Willow’s Young Adults ministry in the 1980s. Though I felt unworthy, Warren and other leaders welcomed me with open arms in their group, and that changed everything. In that group, I discovered the value of Christ-centered friendships. Unlike my past relationships, these were rooted in authenticity, vulnerability, and faith. Some of those friendships have lasted over 30 years, growing deeper through prayer, shared struggles, and conversations about God. What began as casual hangouts eventually became true community—gathered around a table, walking with Christ together.

• Can you share a time when a friendship went through a hard season? What helped you persevere or discern it was time to let go? How did you invite God into that process?
  • W: In a past couples’ small group, we experienced conflict over parenting differences. One wasn’t resolved well, but the other led to growth because we chose to walk through the “tunnel of chaos” together. There’s no single formula for friendship or reconciliation, it takes discernment. Sometimes one person is ready to reconcile, and the other isn’t. That’s okay. What matters is letting go of judgment and choosing empathy and trying to understand where others are coming from. Lindsay and I once navigated a tough friendship, and involving a neutral, trusted third party—our small group—helped bring peace. It reminded us of the Timothy model: reconciliation through truth, humility, and community.
  • L: Sometimes friendships or group dynamics feel stuck—like you’re not in the same place emotionally or spiritually. With prayer, God may lead you to press in or give you peace to walk away. I’ve had friendships where conflict was resolved through humility, vulnerability, and the help of a trusted, neutral friend. I’ve also chosen to stay in hard seasons, sensing God’s call to walk patiently with a friend through their healing. We all carry unseen brokenness, and often don’t realize it until relationships test us. But if we stay humble and open to God’s leading, He’ll use even the hardest moments to grow us.

• We often hear, “not all friendships are meant to last forever.” How do you handle the grief or guilt that can come with friendship breakups, especially in the church? How does Jesus’ example help shape a healthy view of boundaries and grace?
  • L:  I’ve often felt guilty about relationships that only lasted for a season. I don’t have a high capacity for many close friendships, so I’ve had to let some go, and that guilt has weighed on me. Even back in middle school, I remember being part of a friend group and wanting to share Jesus with them since none of them knew God. I told them I couldn’t join in on some things they were doing, and it definitely made things awkward. Eventually, I chose to walk away because I didn’t want friendships where I had to be silent about my faith. Looking back, I realize how important it is to talk openly about expectations in friendships. Looking at Jesus’ example of healthy boundaries and grace, I’ve come to appreciate having an inner circle of close friends, as well as acquaintances—each valuable in different ways. Some friends I can be completely vulnerable with, others I simply enjoy spending time with, and some I serve alongside. Many of my friendships started through serving—like back in the day at Promiseland, where I met a group of women I loved serving with week after week. If you’re feeling lonely, my advice is simple: start serving. It’s an amazing way to connect and build meaningful friendships.
  • W: I had a close, dear friend, but over time, we grew apart. I don’t believe I did anything wrong—it was just a season that ended, and I had to accept where things were and allow time to heal. It’s similar to dating and breaking up, where someone may become “a person you used to know.” It’s important to push through the grief and guilt, resisting the negative voices the enemy tries to use against you and to lean into new opportunities for friendships with others.

• What has helped you maintain life-giving friendships in the busyness of parenting, work, and ministry? Are there specific rhythms that keep your friendships spiritually and emotionally healthy?
  • L: Carving out time at least once a month amid the busyness has been key. Sometimes, a simple text message check-in is enough to keep friendships alive. Warren and I decided together to be more flexible—whether we were busy or our friends were going through busy seasons—and to adapt how we nurture different friendships depending on the season they’re in. For example, when one of my friends was sick, we brought dinner to her family, creating a meaningful sense of community for both her and ours. Through these experiences, we’ve learned the importance of showing up in ways that fit each season of life.
  • W: Quantity breeds quality. Quality friendships often come from investing time, even during busy seasons. Like Lindsay said, setting realistic expectations, like checking in with a quick text, can be a meaningful way to nurture connections. You have to intentionally carve out time and make it part of your schedule, because with kids, work, and everything else, it won’t just happen on its own. The real value is doing life together. It’s not always about deep conversations, but about sharing the everyday moments (even the mundane ones). What matters most is simply showing up.

• If you could tell your younger selves one truth about friendships, what would it be?
  • W: Your life trajectory is shaped by the quality of godly friendships that you have. Throughout my journey, there have been key people whose godly counsel guided me whenever I faced a fork in the road—whether it was decisions about work, my marriage, or my kids. Surrounding yourself with wise, faithful friends can make all the difference, leading you closer to the purpose God has for your life.
  • L: Friendships like these are incredibly important. Seek them out through prayer and be willing to do the hard work they require. True godly relationships—those rooted in a shared devotion to Christ—have completely transformed my life. I believe it’s in these friendships that God does His deepest work. And don’t forget mentorship—find someone to mentor, or be open to being mentored.

Lindsay and Warren’s story is a powerful reminder that when you plant yourself in godly community, God can grow relationships deeper and stronger than you ever imagined.

If you’re longing for that kind of connection, Willow Groups are a great place to start. Use the Group Finder to discover a community where you can grow in faith and friendship here.