If you come across your enemy’s ox or donkey wandering off, be sure to return it.  If you see the donkey of someone who hates you fallen down under its load, do not leave it there; be sure you help them with it.
Exodus 23:4-5

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I have someone in my life who is particularly difficult to be around. When we are in a private conversation, she will interrupt and talk over me or completely ignore what I say. Sometimes I wonder if I am invisible or if she realizes a conversation goes both ways. I often feel drained after we are together because there tends to be a lot of complaining. To preserve my energy, I learned to visualize a conveyor belt in my mind.  When we speak, the important and helpful things stay on the belt and the unhelpful or complaints fall off. It’s a difficult relationship to navigate, and while I tend to avoid this person unless necessary, I must learn to navigate since our situation requires us to work side by side on a regular basis. Do you have anyone similar in your life?

Last year, she went through a particularly hard time—one I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. While I didn’t know the exact details of the situation, I could tell she was distracted and trying her best to do business as usual while navigating a very deep personal crisis. A couple of times, I saw tears welling up in her eyes and asked if everything was okay.  She would always brush it off until one day, she couldn’t hold back anymore. The tears streamed down her face as she went into detail about the situation. By the end of the conversation, we were both in tears.  I prayed for God to lead me to the right words to say to offer her comfort and compassion. As much as I usually avoided conversation with her, I knew her vulnerability meant she needed someone to listen, pray, and be present with her. I could sense her relief as we parted ways. 

Through this interaction, I was reminded that God’s intention isn’t for us to ignore our enemies but rather to be present with anyone who is in need. God’s intention is for us to help those who are struggling and for us to serve one another with abandon. 

Next Steps

Think of someone you have a difficult relationship with. Have you ignored them in a time of need? Remember, each one of us is on our own journey, and we don’t always know what others are going through. Pray for God to change your heart and theirs. Pray for release from resentment and anger and to see them with kindness and understanding like God sees them. Pray for healing to begin and to grow in patience and humility and for love to replace any bitterness.